Bruno

Just over six weeks ago, we welcomed our darling boy Bruno into the world. He is a gentle little soul who sleeps a lot and, when awake, stares quietly into my eyes (or the space just behind my head). His big brother is besotted with him and would like nothing more than for Bruno to just move into his room already so Hugo can be left alone to shower him with endless kisses.

As an only child, I always wondered what it would be like to have two children to love. How could it be possible to feel equally about both children, to love a second child just as much as you did the first? Well, spoiler alert, turns out it's easy as pie. As soon as Bruno was placed in my arms in the hospital, I fell desperately in love. His soft little head, his funny little cries, his sweet and tiny feet… Oooh, a new baby is the most wonderful, most delicious thing in the world. We are so lucky.

The postpartum time has been so much easier this time around. Perhaps it's because Bruno is such an easy baby, or because Hugo is already so big. Or maybe it's because I made a solemn vow to myself to never let a day go by without a shower and putting on real clothes and makeup? (Pro tip for all new moms!) Let's just say it's a happy confluence of all of that. I've even been cooking – soba noodles and Molly's granola number 5, banana bread and beef stew, no-knead pizza (delicious) and kibbe.

In other news, it has felt dissonant at best to be immersed in the heady, joyful and exhausting world of caring for a newborn simultaneously with what has felt like the breakdown of so much that we as U.S. citizens hold dear about our country. I am heartsick and enraged by what is happening at the highest levels of government and by the many accounts of cruelty and intolerance trickling down to the population at large. But I am also heartened and proud of my fellow Americans who are resisting as best they can through protest, activism and civic engagement.

It is so easy to feel helpless and hopeless, but the truth is that we all can pitch in and help defend the values that make America such a special place. Inspired by Happy Menocal, I held a little fundraiser for the ACLU on my Instagram account a couple weeks ago. It went so well (and so quickly – $1000 raised in about 10 minutes!) that I am determined to keep going with these little acts of solidarity with the organizations and people who will defend the best parts of the American experiment.

To blog about food in a time of such crisis has felt so impossible to me. I'm still trying to figure it all out, how to write about inconsequential stuff like granola and beef stew while also channeling my outrage and despair productively. Luckily, my amazing colleagues in the online food world are on it:

Tim writes about how to make fundraising for a cause you believe in a sociable and fun experience – right in your own home.

Food52, after pledging more diversity, both in their staff and in the subjects they cover, publishes a thought-provoking piece on turmeric latte and cultural appropriation.

Catherine regales us with her hilarious ('cause they're true) protest signs – plus tomato soup.

Amelia made me cry with her realization about us and Hillary. Plus she made onigiri to take to the Women's March in LA. Smart lady.

Sarah puts into words so much of what is swirling in my head these days about our new reality.

On a much more personal level, earlier this year, in an effort to include more diverse voices in my book diet, I committed to reading at least 12 books this year by people of color. I have always considered myself an open-minded, Black Lives Matter-supporting, bleeding heart liberal, but if the past year has proven anything, it's that even us well-meaning white people still have so much learning – and opening of minds – to do. It's not that I've avoided writers of color in the past, but my book consumption definitely skews white and I think it's important for me to intentionally seek out other voices this year. I feel a little funny spelling this all out here, but maybe that discomfort is part of the point.

So far, I've read Colson Whitehead's The Underground Railroad (I actually started just before the election and then found myself so devastated by the racist implications of what happened on November 8th that I had to stop reading until I could bear it again), Yaa Gyasi's Homegoing (read entirely during bleary-eyed night feeds and it was still riveting) and I've started Ta-Nehisi Coates' Between the World and Me (exquisite writing on a subject so infuriating – the unequaled violence that black bodies have always endured and must continue to endure in America – that I keep having to put it down and take deep breaths before continuing. Also, I am decidedly not someone who highlights sentences or passages with a pen when I read, but I may have to make an exception for this book.). Next up: Zadie Smith's Swing Time, Jacqueline Woodson's Brown Girl Dreaming, Ayobami Adebayo's Stay With Me and Brit Bennett's The Mothers. Have any more suggestions for me?

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122 responses to “Now We Are Four”

  1. Luisa Avatar

    Blog book club?!? xo

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  2. Luisa Avatar

    Thank you – and yes, it’s crazy to think how long (gods willing) they’ll be in each other’s lives. Lucky boys. 🙂

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  3. Luisa Avatar

    Yes, all the way back in high school and college, actually!

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  4. Luisa Avatar

    Have heard such good things, don’t know why I’ve never read it! On my list it goes…

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  5. Luisa Avatar

    Thank you for your kind words about my book. So happy to read them. And thanks for your recs!

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  6. Luisa Avatar

    Thank you, to everything! xoxo

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  7. Luisa Avatar

    You can do it! 🙂

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  8. Luisa Avatar

    Thank you! I’ve been too scared about the subject matter to pick up A Little Life, even though I’ve heard nothing but raves. So maybe The People In The Trees can be my Hanya intro! 🙂

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  9. Jill Avatar
    Jill

    I haven’t seen the OJ documentary, but it’s on my list!
    One more book recommendation: Raising Mixed Race, by Sharon Chang. Although it’s marketed for parents of mixed race children (especially those with Asian ancestry), it’s illuminating for anyone who wants to understand the history of race and privilege. The author’s blog is also helpful if you are looking for resources to raise race-resilient children. Her list of children’s books featuring people of color is terrific. I realized last year that my 2-year-old daughter (who is mixed race) sees very few faces that look like her in her books, and I’ve been trying hard to make sure she sees worlds that don’t default to white as “normal”. It takes some digging, but we’ve found some sweet, charming, funny books that show kids from a variety of backgrounds.

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  10. Ulrike Avatar
    Ulrike

    Congratulations to your baby boy!
    From 2days Tagesspiegel in Berlin:
    http://www.tagesspiegel.de/kultur/bachmann-preistraegerin-sharon-dodua-otoo-farben-und-freiheiten/19545434.html
    Sounds interesting, the author is living in Berlin and adds her views on color in Germany.

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  11. Kate Avatar
    Kate

    Men We Reaped by Jesmyn Ward is exquisite.

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  12. Susan Ruffins Avatar
    Susan Ruffins

    Dear Luisa,
    I haven’t read through all the comments, so apologies in advance if my book recommendation has already been noted by other responders. As the natural companion piece to “Between the World and Me” you should read “The Warmth of Other Suns” by Isabel Wilkerson. It is a comprehensive description of the circumstances that gave rise to the Great Migration and describes how african american communities settled into Northern and Western cities and the challenges they faced as unwanted newcomers.

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  13. Sarah Wood Avatar

    What an amazing read. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, we are currently deciding if we shouls have a second baby and reading this has definitely made me consider it more. Thank you again!

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  14. Leah Avatar
    Leah

    Luisa, it’s me! Late but hopefully not too late with my book rec; I can’t imagine you have run out of reading material yet given how precious reading time is with a newborn! I’m about to start ‘Exit West’ by Mohsin Hamid, ISBN 0241290082. I heard him interviewed and bought the book immediately because what he had to say about migration and families was truth and his prose was transcendent. Big hugs & kisses for you and the new little man, as well as the rest of your family xoxo

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  15. Mary France Avatar

    Oh my gosh! congratulations – what a cutie!

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  16. Elise Avatar

    My Journey With Maya, Travis Smiley. I’m a huge fan of Maya Angelou but the wisdom in this book, what she imparts to “young Travis Smiley” (as she called him) is outstanding. Congratulations on your new son!

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  17. zakir Avatar

    wow i like this website

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  18. Sarah Snell Avatar

    I must say, you are must be blessed to have such adorable child “Bruno” in your arms. Its really not so difficult to distribute your love to both of your children cause mothers love cannot be measure in any measurement tools 🙂
    Best wishes always
    Sarah Snell

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  19. Mary Avatar
    Mary

    For a fun and interesting, very informative read, consider “The President’s Kitchen Cabinet” by Adrian Miller. It’s “the story of the African Americans who have fed our First Families from the Washingtons to the Obamas.”
    The author gave a presentation at the National Archives a few weeks ago.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Nv7TaZP1pU

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  20. Venessa Avatar

    Best wishes for the new member of your family. Awwwee… “Bruno”- looks so adorable!!!

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  21. Carola Avatar
    Carola

    Hello Luisa!
    Congratulations on little Bruno! As tiring as having two is going to be (it gets better, though!), one of the most fascinating things for me was realizing that a baby with the same parents, same genetic information in a different mix and more or less same parenting style can produce completely different little humans! It’s quite the trip, but also a good way for parents to give themselves a break: since the kids seem to come with much of their personality out-of-the-box, it’s not alone down to the parents to take responsibility when the behavior isn’t stellar (no matter what cranky old German ladies tell you…) Go ahead and take credit for the good parts, though!
    Enjoy the ride!
    Book recommendation (although a few years old already): The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd.

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  22. Julie Avatar

    I bet you are totally enjoying your every moment with the gorgeous looking new member. God bless him.

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