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Okay, friends, let's talk about baby-led weaning today. For those of you who don't know what baby-led weaning is, it's basically a philosophy of feeding children that says that children should be the ones who choose what they put in their mouths, not their parents. Instead of making puréed fruits and vegetables and spooning them into your baby's mouth, you put food (cooked until soft and cut into small pieces) in front of your baby and let him feed himself.


At first, most of the food will end up on the floor (or elsewhere), but slowly your child will figure out how to get the food in his mouth. (Since most of his diet will still be coming from milk for the first year, it doesn't matter, nutrition-wise, if it takes a while for him to figure this out). All that baby-led weaning technically "requires" is a washable high chair and a high tolerance for mess. No immersion blenders, no baby spoons, no melamine plates.

(From what I can tell, baby-led weaning is really popular in England and gaining popularity in the US. Here in Germany, it's pretty rare – almost everyone I know gives their babies puréed foods.)

When I was first pregnant, my friend Sylee loaned me her copy of this book and told me that she believed that one of the main reasons why her daughter, now four, was such a good eater was because they did baby-led weaning. Having watched many of my friends engage in power struggles with their small children over food, I was really intrigued by the idea that starting a kid off this way would ensure a love of a wide variety of foods.

And so, last month, after having spent weeks painstakingly cooking and puréeing food for Hugo to try, I plopped him in his chair, boiled some carrot coins until they were soft enough to be squished between my thumb and forefinger and put them on the table in front of him. Then I slowly backed away and watched.

At first, he didn't really know what to do. He'd grab a coin or two and push them over the edge of the table, or bring them to his mouth, but then couldn't figure out how to get them in. It was pretty funny – and hard not to intervene! Once he did get a few in his mouth, he rolled them around for a while. And then he started choking on them. Not turning-blue-choking – he was always able to get them back out of his throat into his mouth – but still, it was a little stressful to watch!

The next time, I decided to give him steamed broccoli florets. These were much easier for him to get into his mouth in the first place (the stems are the perfect baby-handle) and the soft broccoli tips went down pretty easily.

Since then I've given him rice crackers and Zwieback to chew, a piece of orange to suck on, the soft, sticky interior of a date, some soup from my plate and other odds and ends. But ultimately, I decided that baby-led weaning isn't really for us right now. The thing is, Hugo is hungry at mealtimes. When I make him purées and soft pastas in broth to feed him, he gulps them down and opens his mouth for more. When I let him feed himself, he ends up frustrated and hungry. And also? The mess was too much for me. Remember, I'm home by myself with Hugo five days a week. I'm the only one on full-time baby and clean-up duty, all day long. If he'd taken to baby-led weaning like a duck to water, I might have been okay with the mess. But when we went back to purées, we were both happier and he was more content.

So, like with so many parenting choices, baby-led weaning works for some families and not for others. For the time being, Hugo is content for me to feed him (he even keeps his little hands carefully by his sides, never interfering with the spoon!) and I don't mind making all these special little pots for him. I'm not too worried about whether or not he'll be a picky eater as an older kid. It seems to me that that's the kind of thing we'll just have to wait and see on. Right now I'd like to bask in his fleeting babyhood. We'll cross that next bridge when we come to it.

How about you, readers? Tell me your thoughts and experiences!

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58 responses to “Cooking for Hugo: Baby-Led Weaning”

  1. Amy Avatar

    It worked for me. I’m in the US and am the only one among my friends who even nursed a baby. I nursed two, exclusively, for 9 whole months before I introduced solids, starting with chunky mashed sweet potatoes and a chicken soup I’d make with apples, boneless chicken thighs, carrots, and broth. I’d mix that all up into a chunky stew in the food processor and let them have at it – they loved it. My third is only 6 months so he has a bit of time to go before he starts eating.
    Baby #1 has become a picky eater despite having an early love for broccoli and meats. All she wants is pasta or peanut butter and jelly on a spoon. We don’t give in, but it is making mealtime stressful. She’ll soon grow out of it, I know. Baby #2 is 2.5 yrs and eats anything I serve her – even sardines, and liver pate, and spinach quiche. About the only thing #2 won’t eat is avocado.
    I found that delaying solids made the experience of transitioning them very easy. Breastmilk alone satisfied them for almost a year, and they fully weaned by 18 months, though #2 still asks for a cup of breastmilk now and then, when I’m feeding #3. It was a great experience and low stress for everyone involved.

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  2. www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=546659182 Avatar

    Having a dog really helps. We didn’t rename ours Hoover, but we certainly thought it.

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  3. Melanie Haynes Avatar

    We did a combination so Noah was fed a bit of puree at the start of the meal and then I offered the baby led weaning food at the same time or afterwards. By 9 month old he was refusing the spoon and feeding himself. At 3 he is a great and adventurous eater now but I think that BLW was only a part of that. Try again when Hugo is a bit older or try the combination way. He made more mess refusing the spoon than with BLW! The splatters on the wall behind his chair were proof of that. Good luck and try what you are comfortable with. x

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  4. Delyth@thedelicious.net Avatar

    I have a 5 month old and am looking forward to feeding her solids next month. I’m going to puree everything for her, including as many different tastes as I can. For me, personally, I couldn’t tolerate the mess and also feel it’s important that children learn to eat with a knife and fork (or spoon) and that ‘playing’ with your food is not acceptable. This is how I was brought up with table manners being very important. Probably some would say that baby led weaning is in no way connected to ‘bad’ table manners, but I’m just a little quirky that way.

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  5. Hannah Avatar
    Hannah

    I’m pregnant with my second and hoping to try a little more BLW this time. With my first, he had no teeth until almost ten months and I was working full-time so I needed him to actually eat some solids a little earlier since starting around six months it was hard for me to to pump often enough for him to eat nothing but breast milk during the day. We did a little BLW on weekends when he could just nurse if not much eating occurred, and during the week when I was at work, he ate yogurt and purees so I could count on him having at least one non-milk meal a day starting around seven months. He’s now two and a great eater, and I attribute it more to what we fed him (a lot of dal, amaranth, homemade in-season purees) than how. BLW seems like a great option if you are able to (a) be at home to nurse and (b) can handle the mess, but there are still plenty of ways to foster a healthy relationship to food if it doesn’t work for you. Check out Ellyn Satter’s book, Child of Mine, if you haven’t already–great approach for making mealtimes less of a battle.

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  6. Amanda Avatar
    Amanda

    I think there are cool things about baby-led weaning, and I incorporated some of it into my son’s feeding (unintentionally, since I had never heard of it at that point), but I think that the biggest contributors to adventurous eating are probably giving a wide variety of foods and making mealtimes as pleasant stress-free as possible. For me, that sometimes meant baby cereal or jarred food, and sometimes meant a taste of whatever I was eating, and sometimes meant specially prepared baby or toddler foods. And I hear you on the clean-up issue! A mess is unavoidable once they start feeding themselves, whether with their hands or spoons, but it is not fun. Love this new feature, by the way!

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  7. fiona Avatar
    fiona

    One thing to try — you can feed him the purees when he’s super hungry, then give him a few bits of food for the last few minutes of mealtime. That way he’s not panicky and hungry, but still gets a chance to try it out slowly for himself.
    Make sure to cut the carrots in half lengthwise as well – the coin shape is not recommended because it can lodge in the throat in that round shape.
    Lots of folks say it can take 15+ introductions to certain foods before a kid will like them. But most parents give up at attempt #2 or #3, and declare that the kid doesn’t like it. But keep trying with a neutral face and demeanor, and keep offering with a simple, “Oh, maybe next time!” and offer something else. Kids have super intense tastebuds!
    You might enjoy Ellyn Satter’s work: http://www.ellynsatter.com/
    http://www.ellynsatter.com/to-months-feeding-your-older-baby-i-29.html
    She has a lot of helpful information regarding feeding your kid, divided into age ranges from babies to teenagers!
    Hugo will love food, don’t you worry 🙂

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  8. Victoria Avatar

    I’m with you. It did not work for us. My son just seems to happy with us spoon-feeding him right now. He has a good appetite and doesn’t seem picky yet. Plus it’s just so cute the way he keeps his arms down and opens his mouth for the spoon like a little bird.

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  9. Michelle Avatar
    Michelle

    I didn’t know that method had a name. When I was teaching my son to eat solids, I gave him what I was eating and we did great. To each baby their own…

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  10. Aleisa Avatar
    Aleisa

    For our first son, I was all geared up to make purees (and freeze them), having been inspired by Deb’s series of posts on Smitten Kitchen. But it was so much work! And then, without having read about baby-led weaning, we sort of fell into that way of doing things. By 6 months, breastfeeding had become so easy(finally!), and all that chopping, boiling, pureeing, storing, and cleaning up (the kitchen and the baby) was just too much. We gradually introduced finger foods and mashed foods beginning around 9 months. He’s a little over two now, and an adventurous eater (though I don’t know that I’d credit baby-led weaning with making him that way).
    This time around (our second is 6 months), I think we’ll do something similar (unless Henry starts showing a keener interest in our food before the nine-month mark).
    That said, I’ve had many friends who’ve had success introducing solids at 6 months. Like so many things, I suppose it’s a matter of what works best for a particular baby (and a particular parent).
    Whichever method, it’s wonderful to watch a baby discover and delight in new foods 🙂

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  11. Amy P Avatar

    My daughter is 8 months old and we do BLW because there was really no other option- she grabs a spoon if it comes anywhere near her face. I feel like I spend 20% of my day cleaning up after her, but she really likes feeding herself so it’s working for us. Roasted sweet potatoes, broccoli, and steamed apples and pears are her current favorites (I also think they are easy to actually eat, so they don’t cause too much frustration). Thanks for sharing your adventures with Hugo- it’s nice to hear how other babies are doing with their forays into food.

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  12. Gabriela (Gabi with an Eye) Avatar

    Hi Luisa, totally with you on this one. Since I did not want a picky eater, we introduced our daughter to everything on our plates. I’m talking, swordfish, bass, tilapia, salmon, spinach, green beans, peas, carrots, spices such as jalapeno salsa with Serrano chiles, cooked onions (French onion soup), yogurt, cottage cheese, ham, etc. I did not want a child that refused to eat bread crust or demanded that the crust be trimmed off her PB&J, so along with the Zwieback I trimmed the crust off the whole grain bread slices and fed them to her. That’s right, I would trim the crust and place it in ziplock baggies to take with us when we went out with her. Accordingly, the child learned to love bread crust. We started her on bread crust and adult food when the teeth started to come in at around 4 months and gave her a baby spoon (the kind that is coated in rubber or vinyl) with which to feed herself.
    I also did not want my child to be contrary and use the word “no” when she was 2 and 3 years old. So we simply avoided using the word no and replaced it with positive commands like, keep feet your feet still, close the door and come back and sit with me, keep your food on your plate (we placed her food on a small plastic plate instead of on the table or high chair tray).
    At 9 months we noticed that she would dab her mouth with a paper napkin during meals. I was shocked and asked my husband when and where had she learned this. He replied, “From watching you. That’s what you do throughout your meal.” So apparently my infant child had been watching me dab the corners of my mouth with my napkin at each meal and picked up the habit on her own.
    The other astonishing incident was that we never had to remind her to chew with her mouth closed. Believe me, I was poised and ready to demonstrate how to chew with a closed mouth but since the first spoonful of infant cereal that went into her tiny mouth, she has always chewed with her mouth closed. I did not knowingly teach her that. She must have picked it up by watching us.
    We also started taking her to restaurants when she was about 3 months old. We always took the bread crust strips with us along with fruit and a toy which we used to keep her entertained (read: quiet) while we waited for our meals to be served. We only went out AFTER she’d awakened from her nap so she would be well rested. We’ve never had to deal with our screaming child in a public place.
    The only foods that caused our daughter to shiver with shock or disgust are acidic fruits. Much as we tried, she would never eat an orange, a tangerine, a red ruby grapefruit, etc. or drink fruit juice, not even apple and certainly not grape. The pediatrician assured us that it was alright for her not to drink fruit juice. She drinks bottled water and organic milk. Her aversion to fruit juice still bugs me though. It’s most unsettling.
    Well, ‘sallfernow. Sorry about the long response.

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  13. Sara Avatar
    Sara

    We’re in the US and we are doing baby-led weaning with our 1 year old (as are most our friends with their kids). We always cut her food into french fry shape (long skinny), not rounds to prevent choking. She’s never actually choked on anything. At the beginning we only gave her 1-2 pieces at a time so there wasn’t much mess at all. She always tried to grab the spoon or swat at it when we fed purees so that was always more messy. Every mom and baby is different so do what works for you!

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  14. Wendy Avatar
    Wendy

    Well, mine are now 14 and 11, so it’s been a while. I think people have overthought the whole solids thing, frankly, and that you’re doing fine. Anyhow, I nursed them both for well over a year, and we introduced some solids at about 6 months, and then gradually upped the “regular food, just pureed” quotient, eventually moving to finger foods and introducing a spoon. I cook a lot, and try new foods all the time. When they got old enough for it to matter to me, we unveiled the “One Bite Rule,” which (obviously) is a requirement that they eat one bite of every food provided at the meal, new foods as well as ones that have previously been labeled “yucky,” because views can change over time. I sometimes make an exception if the dish is very spicy. Despite all this, I take little credit for the fact that they are both fairly adventuresome eaters — my observation is that kids come hard-wired to a large extent with regard to what they’ll like and what not, and the best I can do is make sure they are resigned/accustomed to giving foods a good tryout before rejecting them permanently.
    Hugo is super cute, I have to say. And I know from cute baby boys.

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  15. Ryan Avatar
    Ryan

    I think it’s important to keep in mind that you don’t need to subscribe to one particular philosophy (i.e. – BLW) I have just recently heard about it and it seems like it’s better for everyone if you use your intuition and do what works for you and your baby. I feed my 8 1/2 month old pureed and fork mashed foods, but do finger foods at the beginning for a few minutes and at the end. It’s really helpful when you need a few minutes to get the food on the table or when you’re cleaning up!

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  16. Natalie Avatar
    Natalie

    I LOVED BLW. I did it with all three of my kids and by 12 months they were eating whatever my husband and I were eating for meals. They also were completely independently using silverware by 18 months because we started giving them toddler silverware by 12 months.
    I consider my kids a BLW super-successes because the EARLIEST any of them got their first tooth was 14 months.

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  17. Astrid Avatar

    I love this new series about Hugo’s food! Very inspiring! My daughter is 15 months old and is, unfortunately, a picky eater. We do a little bit of both; she eats the food we eat, by herself with a spoon and fork and makes a mess + we feed her purees, porridge, yoghurt with oatmeal, etc. I don’t know how to make her eat more varied – guess I just have to keep trying.

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  18. Brooke M Avatar
    Brooke M

    I agree with Fiona – my child loved to feed himself but sometimes got mad becuase he was hungry and couldn’t really do it well at first, so I would give him a puree or cereal and then scatter a few things out for him to snack on once he had a little bit of something on his stomach to “take the edge off”. I found that he stuck with it much more persistently, and with less of a fit, when he wasn’t totally empty (in my family we call that “getting low” as in low blood sugar and we’re all more prone to a fit or meltdown when we get low). Over time, as his motor skills got better, I did less and less of the feeding (other than nursing) and he got to where he was feeding himself table food almost exclusively by about 9-10 months. It really does help thier motor development while also helping them develop a taste for things. Sadly, since mine has started preschool he’s become picky, but I think that is from hearing other children say they don’t like something. He never used to refuse things. One of his classmates is a vegetarian and has been taught at home to say that meat is yucky, which has rubbed off. I respect his parents’ views but wish they weren’t quite so strident with them, but that’s a totally different comment altogether! Good for you for giving it a try and even better for you to do what works. You can always try to introduce this method again in a month or so; I was always amazed how well my son could communicate whether or not he was ready for something, way before he was verbal. I think one of the hardest and best lesson I had to learn was just to set aside our plans and look for the cues he was giving us!

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  19. sarah Avatar
    sarah

    Very impressed with Hugo and the other babies who keep their hands still!For some reason I gave my son plastic spoons to play with before we started solids so by the time we got to the actual purees last month he had a full blown spoon obsession and insisted on being the one to put the spoon in his mouth. I’d love to say this has resulted in perfect table manners at the age of 7 months but although he does manage to consume an impressive amount of food there’s puree pretty much everywhere. Even the poor dog is beetroot stained! So, guessing BLW won’t be any messier but I’m still nervous about choking. One thing that has worked for us is one of those mesh feeders, I put chunks of cold apple and pear in it and he chomps away happily for ages it really seems to help with teething too. Now I just need to work up the nerve to introduce real finger food (before he turns 18)

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  20. Tara Avatar
    Tara

    We started with baby led weaning, but I freaked with the choking too. A girlfriend told me that you’re supposed to let them “choke” (not the turning blue kind, just the gagging) for a count to 20! We’re sort of doing a combination of BLW and purees. I use a food mill for things like mushroom barley soup or lentil soup, but leave some pieces larger. Ben is almost 10 months now so I’m a little bit more comfortable giving him larger pieces of soft food. Like Hugo, Ben is hungry at meal times so he needs a little more assistance with eating. He is a spoon master, though!

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  21. Peggasus Avatar
    Peggasus

    After the baby food/cereal stage, I just pureed the food we were having for my boys (both in their 20s now), or else into small chunks as you describe. I got one picky eater and one who drank pickle juice!
    I also gave them water in their double-handed, weighted sippy cup from the time they were six months old, they were totally off bottles before nine months. I find three and four year olds still drinking from bottles weird.

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  22. Lindsay Avatar
    Lindsay

    I loved the BLW philosophy but was too afraid of the choking/gagging issue to follow through. Plus, my daughter had no issues with spoon feeding so I decided to follow her cues and give her chunkier bits of food when she seemed ready for it. That has worked well for us! At 13 months, she has a great appetite and mostly eats what we eat.

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  23. Gayle Avatar

    Luisa —
    As someone without kids, I have (perhaps surprisingly) been enjoying your posts about feeding Hugo. It’s so nice to read something genuine, about things that work and don’t work, and your attitude towards figuring this out as you go.
    Looking forward to tagging along with you.
    Gayle

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  24. Katie Avatar
    Katie

    Another fan of Ellen Satter’s book here! I didn’t do strict baby led weaning, but I didn’t make special food for my babies either (now 8, 6 and 22 months). I would use a baby food mill similar to this http://www.amazon.com/KidCo-F700-Food-Mill/dp/B000067Q6J/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1360362209&sr=8-1&keywords=baby+food+mill and grind up whatever softer foods we were eating. I quickly moved to the babies feeding themselves, I’m just not into spoon feeding the babies for very long. But this was a good start for us.

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  25. NotsNotes Avatar
    NotsNotes

    Both our three and a half year old daughter and our nearly two year old son had solids introduced to them BLW style from 6 months, no purees, though they did have things like applesauce and yoghurt. Risotto was also a big hit with them, and meant they learned to use utensils on their own. Like Fiona said, lengthwise cut carrots work best – we found food cut to pinky finger length and thickness worked best. It probably took about 3 months for them to be getting a proper meal, but like you said, breastmilk’s got them covered.
    We chose BLW for a few reasons. It seemed like the easiest option, as it just required giving the kid lets some of the same food we were eating. That also made it seem the most natural progression from BF – especially since I fed on demand, so they could choose how much to eat and when they were ready to start. As well, I have serious texture issues with mushy foods, so we figured that BLW was a good call to avoid fussy eaters of our own. (I’ve outgrown my fussy-ness for the most part, except the texture thing!)
    The mess? Yes, there can be a fair bit, especially at first, but it levels out. I seem to recall most babies I babysat who had purees made quite a mess of themselves, rather than the floor or highchair, though. 🙂
    Our youngest daughter is only two weeks old, but it will be fun to introduce her to solids when the time comes. And Ryan is right, you can totally make up your own way of doing it. Find what Hugo likes best and go with it!

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  26. Michelle Avatar
    Michelle

    It’s not a magic bullet. It worked for us at the baby stage with our second child. But, he’s now 5 and eats pretty much all fruit and vegetables happily, but other than that – pasta and yogurt and pizza is pretty much about it. My first child, now 8, is a much better eater, and we fed her purees. I think you get what you get, and it’s easy to take credit for your child’s eating habits if they eat well and you feel good about how you fed them as babies. Having 2 is really humbling – you realize how little you control.

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  27. Neda Avatar
    Neda

    we also do both. my first daughter (now 4) only really fed herself cheerios and dinkel stangen, but she always was and still is a very good eater. i cooked “separately” for her until she was a year old, but after she turned a year, I pretty much fed her everything i cooked for my husband and me, which I think might even be more important than letting them feed themselves at such a small age. with my second daughter (now 10.5 months) i let her feed herself more (avocado pieces and squash pieces), and she makes it quite clear what things she likes and what she doesn’t like, and she really does like both – being fed and feeding herself. i think it’s so great that you tried it and realized it didn’t work for you and for Hugo. also, what we ate as mothers while they were in the womb and while we nursed them exclusively can also play a role in future picky eaters (i think so at least!). thanks for sharing! 🙂

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  28. Alexia Avatar

    I did a combo, of feeding my baby girl purees and also giving her things to eat that she could feed herself. I don’t know if you can get them in Germany without mail-ordering them, but I totally recommend Baby Mum Mums.
    My daughter is a fantastic eater, and will try anything. She is 19 mo, and points and will say, “Try it?” until you give her some. She loves super garlicy food, broccoli, pasta, and frozen blueberries. She has also recently developed a love of Gerber baby food, which, after all the organic purees and funky stuff I have given her (soba noodles! With seaweed!) I’m like “Seriously?” I call it the first of many of the ironies of parenthood.

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  29. Sissy Avatar
    Sissy

    Awww what cute little baby hands he has in the picture. I bet he does keep them by his side when you feed him, you’re such a good cook!!

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  30. Margo P Avatar
    Margo P

    I agree with Fiona. Of my three children (9, 14 & 16), two are very adventurous eaters and one gets through dinner, simply for dessert. My two cents is similar to others: keep trying, sometimes it takes a while and tastes ebb and flow. My youngest hated raisins, then liked them, but won’t eat them now. Ditto for orange juice. And so it goes. The clean up will never end, unfortunately. Love Hugo!

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  31. jen Avatar
    jen

    I agree with Michelle — it’s nice to feel good about what you feed them, and obviously you want the options to be healthy and tasty and varied, but preferences seem pretty hardwired. My older daughter (now 6) liked everything as a baby, including purees (all made by me and frozen in ice cube trays — easy portion size, and you always have something around), and is now pretty good about trying things, but would live on pasta and pizza and fruit if she could. My younger kid (2) basically taught me BLW herself, because she wouldn’t touch anything pureed or mushy or anything we tried to feed her. She was much happier when she could pick up chunks of sweet potato, risotto, ground beef, whatever. She is also now pretty good about trying things with a strong preference for pasta, pizza, fruit. But this stage of seeing what they like is fun — enjoy. Hugo is adorable!

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  32. Charlotte Avatar

    I did purees and then moved on to chunkier foods (not realizing there was such a thing as BLW). Our boy was an adventurous eater up to about 18 months and then it all stopped and ever since it has been a struggle to add variety to his diet (he’s 7 now). After years of struggle he was last year diagnosed with a sensory disorder which severely impacts his how he tastes food and his appetite. So go with what works for you and Hugo like you are and enjoy the journey.

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  33. Sabine Avatar

    We’re in Berlin and we did blw too! My daughter (uh, also name Luisa) and we loved the results. She eats everything and anything… or will at least give it a try. And her cutlery skills are above and beyond the average two year old. I think it took us until about 9 or 10 months to get to the point where I felt like she was eating more solids than drinking breast milk, but I’m glad we stuck it out. We have another little munchkin who is 5 months and he seems pretty keen on food so we’ll try some purees on him in the next week and then move him into the BLW program next month. I got some funny looks from Germans when we started, but now that they see the results, they’re pretty impressed. Have fun with the feeding!

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  34. Elina Avatar
    Elina

    There’s no reason you couldn’t do both. I fed my second baby (now 2.5) purees and also let him eat on his own when he wished to do so. At the time my first (now 6) was a baby, baby led weaning hadn’t arrived here. Second is a less picky eater, but I’ll admit that I was a lot more relaxed with eating on the second round.

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  35. Honeybee Avatar
    Honeybee

    We fed purees, too, it worked well for us. Our daughter loved them, still, the puree-phase didn’t last long, she wanted to have whatever we had when she was about 10 or 11 months old. What followed was a phase of rather bland-tasting food for all of us since I couldn’t cook separately for her all the time but was a bit worried (probably too worried) about the salt. She was always easy to feed, I nursed her exclusively first, then nursed only morning and evening, when she went to the nursery. She happily combined everything: breastfeeding with bottle-feeding, then with purees and finally with “proper” food. Now, at 3, she enjoys food as much as we do and will try almost everything. I think we’re mostly just lucky, there is no magic trick to turn your little ones into unfussy, adventurous eaters (of course, offering a great variety of food helps). Some are picky, others aren’t. After all, they’re humans, not machines…

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  36. Dena Avatar

    We served our son special pureed foods from the time he could eat solids. He’s 19 now, healthy and eats pretty much anything. In fact, he’s the most adventurous eater I know. Our daughter, on the other hand, was given only what we ate in a form appropriate to her age….but now she is 11 and one of the pickiest eaters I know. Still, she is healthy and happy so…..I guess what I am trying to say is that we do the best we can with our kids from as early as possible, but then they have to make the world their own….Kudos to you for doing your very best for your little one. He’ll grow up strong and happy as a result.

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  37. Robin Avatar

    I spoon fed my oldest pureed food for the first 3 months and then did a combination of spoon feeding him purees and giving him soft food to feed himself at about 9 months. When he was 10 months old I introduced him to many different foods from our plates, including one weekend homemade pancakes. The following weekend we went out for breakfast and I fed him a jarred puree until the food arrived. When my lemon ricotta pancakes arrived he looked from the jar to the pancakes several times and never let me feed him a puree again.
    My younger child looked really interested in food for months before the pediatrician gave us the go ahead to start feeding him. However every time I tried to spoon feed him after one taste he would turn his face away. This went on for months until I finally pureed the vegetables we were eating, garlic onions and all. He eat 3 small mise en place bowls of the pureed string beans. He just was not a bland food kid.
    I consider both my kids (now 10 and 7) to be picky but most other parents do not as they both love a wide array of vegetables. However if you try to give them vegetables prepared in a different way (like steamed instead of roasted Brussels Sprouts, or steamed instead of grilled or roasted asparagus) they won’t eat any more then a tiny taste.
    Robin

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  38. Laura Avatar
    Laura

    Hi Luisa!
    I have a two year old, so we have just been through this. While it might be exactly in line with blw, we used a lot of pouches (look up “little green pouches” on amazon), and let our wee un have more control over the feeding process. With our older daughter, I loved feeding her, but didn’t enjoy the process – trying to get the spoon into her mouth, running around after her when she wasn’t willing to be confined. Plus, I hated the mess either way. It’s no fun staying home all day just cleaning up after the little mess-maker 🙂
    Hugo is beautiful, and it sounds like you’re having some time where you really revel in him. That’s what matters!

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  39. Sarah G. Avatar
    Sarah G.

    I did purees with my first, who was not very interested in chunks until nearly 18 months old… she still loves purees. I allowed her to make all kinds of messes with her purees, though. At four, she’s a fairly good eater compared to others her age, but of course we always want her to eat more and a wider variety. All in good time. With my second, I was totally ready for purees, and he liked them for about a week. But he saw his big sister eating “real” food and insisted, around 7 months, on BLW. At 14 months, he prefers to feed himself and will sometimes allow me to fill his spoon or fork then set it down for him to feed himself. I still puree things and put them in the Little Green Pouch (we call squeezers). I respected BLW but never expected to do it…. I’ve been humbled by realizing it’s not really my choice. I just want them to eat, so I meet them half way. I present healthy choices, they choose what goes in their mouth.

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  40. Suzy Avatar

    Zoey likes cucumber, Arabic bread and mango. I have to hold the mango because it’s too slippery but she loves it. Yasmine loves her pureed food. I make oats with water, lots of cinnamon and pureed apple or pear.
    I tried to do baby led weaning with Layla and she doesn’t eat anything (as you know). I think introducing pureed food to your baby before she can really argue is a smart way to get her to try new tastes.
    Like these baby posts by the way.

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  41. Danale's Ramblings Avatar

    This is why everybody should do what will work for them. There is no one right way in this. And I hate to burst bubbles, but just because your baby or toddler eats a wide variety of foods as a baby is no guarantee that they will continue to do so. Finicky actually starts much later in most cases. Of course by giving your baby a wide variety you have a better chance of them accepting a wide variety of food, but it is in no way a guarantee.

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  42. Nuts about food Avatar

    I did both: my kids’ main meals consisted of puréed foods, cereals etc. (like you say, they were hungry and impatient) but then also gave them soft food (random vegetables, little cubes of cheese and other) to eat on their own for snacks or alongside their meal. I think a happy medium or what works best with you is the right thing: a serene mother makes for a serene child.
    Also, now that my second child is 3, I have realized that however you feed your child, pickiness is a phase of growing up. Both my kids are really good eaters and have been taught to at least try everything and have never been catered to (except in a few cases, like very spicy food) but they both have phases of not liking one thing or the other (which can change in the matter of a month).

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  43. shelly Avatar
    shelly

    We are in Israel, with a 4.5 yr old boy and a girl due any moment. I nursed Alon for 1+ years, and apart from a few bottles of formula when I had to go to class, he was nursed exclusively for the first 6 months. My husband used to be a cook, I am an avid baker, and there is almost no food that our kitchen hasn’t seen, barring of course supplies and ingredients that are hard to come by in these parts (read: lye for my pretzels!). The first food I ever gave Alon was avocado, and one of his favorite first combos was avocado + banana. I then proceeded to boil, puree, and mash anything I could, and for flavor I would add some tahini or almond butter or date syrup (rub). You probably already know this, but your ice tray is very handy for keeping leftovers/extras of anything you make. When going out, I would take out a few “cubes” of whatever I had, and that way I always had something to feed him even when we were out of the house. Alon’s first tooth came in after his 1st b-day, so the food was being served soft for a long while, but as soon as he could grab w/ his fingers, I moved from mashes and purees to finger-sized bites and let him feed himself, by hand or w/ a spoon, whichever he demanded at the time. If the mess is hard on you, as it was on my husband, laying down some newspapers under/around the high chair makes for an easy(ier) cleanup.
    Today, Alon is an excellent eater, especially in that he is willing to try almost any food you put in front of him. Looking around, mostly at my nieces and nephews, I think this stems from two key points.
    First of all, we eat a wide variety of foods at home and neither me nor my husband are picky eaters ourselves. There are things that we never buy (soda, sweetened juices, candy), but we almost never say “no” to something he wants to try when we’re out of the house, even if we loathe seeing him eat/drink it (diabetic grandparents means he sometimes drinks diet soda at their house- yuck!). Interestingly enough, he’s now at a stage where having “big muscles” and “being really strong” is linked to vitamins and minerals in food (got this from his kindergarten, probably), so explaining to him what’s “healthy” and what isn’t is actually quite effective. But we are in no way fanatics.
    Secondly, we don’t cater to his culinary whimsies. He eats what we eat, always has, within reason of course. If we’ve made something that he doesn’t like or refuses to eat, we don’t make something else especially for him. We try to get him to eat at least one part of the meal and encourage him to try everything. I’ve seen so many children whose parents are so afraid they won’t eat anything because they’re such picky eaters that meals always include “specialty” dishes for one, if not more, of the children: “sauceless” and “clean” rice and pasta for the child who won’t go near these if something’s been added to them; a separate ‘salad’ for the child who doesn’t eat tomatoes, cucumbers, etc. This can go on and on and become total insanity, making food and mealtimes a very stressful and combative situation. We really believe that if you reinforce this “I don’t like tomatoes” part of a kid, it almost becomes part of his identity and is really hard to change later on. Case in point: my hub’s 3 older brothers are all defined at mealtime by what they don’t eat- the oldest- fish, the 2nd- tomatoes, the 3rd- rice. That I know this about them is testament to how deeply ingrained it is, both in each one of them individually and in the “food identity” of the entire family.
    Having said all that, as one reader mentioned above, pickiness is a stage. We’ve been told many times by many parents that the child who is an excellent eater at 4 or 5, will at age 7 refuse everything except white bread with cheese.
    So, as with all crossroads we reach in our parenting – do what feels right for you and your child. And don’t forget your common sense! Oh, please don’t forget it! More often than not, it will lead you in the right direction.

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  44. clare Avatar
    clare

    We didn’t use BLW for H (currently 18 months old). His daycare doesn’t encourage the kids to eat with their hands – she’s been giving them a spoon to hold while feeding them since they started eating solids. We followed her lead (well – he insisted we did) and always gave him a spoon to hold when we’re feeding him. It’s helped him think about how to use it, and try to imitate our movements. He’s pretty good about using the spoon now and can get most things to his mouth (we still help, but less and less). H was also never fond of pieces of things – he was very used to stewed meats and beans on rice (thanks daycare!), so pieces of dry veggies or meat don’t appeal to him. All in all, it’s worked out fine – it fit his preferences and his environment at daycare.

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  45. TheKitchWitch Avatar

    I guess I sort of did an unconscious, moron-version of BLW with my little one. She was a cuddler and especially liked to cuddle at the most inconvenient times (eg: whenever I sat down at the dinner table).
    More often than not, I’d eat dinner with her in my lap, and for some reason, she thought that any food eaten off of my plate was delicious! All kinds of fish, veg, soup. As long as she ate it while sitting on my lap (pilfering my dang dinner), she loved it.
    ps: the child is now seven and eats zero of those things she showed such affection for. Gaaa! I give up.

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  46. Steph Avatar
    Steph

    Hugo is a doll!
    I have a 2 1/2 year old son and a 10 month old daughter. I nursed both of them for about 6 weeks (I was not a good milk producer) and then they ended up on soy formula because they had reactions to milk-based formulas. (As in hives and bloody stool. Sorry if that’s tmi.)
    Anyway, they also both did not have a single tooth until around 9 months, so I did not do baby led weaning.
    My son showed interest in pureed solids when he was around 8 or 9 months old and I fed them to him to minimize mess. (I too stay at home and am the cleaner of all the messes. Not my favorite thing to do!)
    I never made my own baby food, something I always thought I would do! But life happens and where is the time?
    He was pretty picky about which purees he’d eat so we weren’t sure how he’d turn out with ‘real’ food.
    Though we started trying to get him to eat real food at 12 months, he ate strictly purees and formula until he was about 15 months. At that time he’d eat bread, goldfish, bananas, apples, pears…all the while still drinking formula.
    It wasn’t until we had our daughter when our son was 20 months old that he started to eschew the bottle and try people food. I think maybe associating ‘baby’ with bottle drinking had something to do with it.
    Now he is 2 1/2 and eats almost anything. He became very adventurous at around age 2. He loves chicken and rice, french fries (of course), bread, bagels, rolls, goldfish (still), grapes, bananas, avocados (‘ow cows’, as he calls them. Too cute.). He’ll devour pasta with chicken or pork, and even gobbled up kale with garlic, grits, and chicken thighs that I made last week. I always add a vegetable and he loves most of them – zucchini, all squash, broccoli, greens.
    He’s been known to eat a meatball sub.
    The only taste he really does not like is spicy.
    In restaurants he’ll gobble up edamame and seaweed salad, and he loves dumplings. Of course, he eats the occassional chicken finger but really doesn’t have a sweet tooth. He doesn’t eat pizza because the milk allergy still causes hives (we keep trying). He’s shown no interest in either of his birthday cakes.
    And how could I forget his favorite food of all time – hummus!
    (Oh, and 99% of the time my son still wants a bottle upon waking.
    My 10 month old daughter is peculiar. She wants nothing to do with solid food. We sit her in her high chair and give her Cheerios but all she does is play with them. She’ll spit out purees and turn her head or bat the spoon away. If you are lucky you can get her to suck on a slice of apple or pear. She wants her bottle and that’s it.
    I think it’s because she is really suffering with teething right now. With my son it was never this bad. She’s miserable and always gnawing on her fingers.
    It’s so interesting to read about all the different approaches and reactions of parents and babies! We are all so different yet most of us arrive to adulthood with a pretty wide range of foods we like!
    I remember being a picky eater as a kid. Now there are probably 2 foods I dislike. (One is bleu cheese. Most of the time. I’m sure there is another.)
    Overall I love everything.
    I am in the United States and I do believe many overthing the whole thing these days. 🙂
    Love your blog!

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  47. Steph Avatar
    Steph

    Oops, meant ‘overthink’. I am also sleep deprived. 🙂

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  48. Em Avatar

    I didn’t do baby-led weaning, and my daughter is a great eater! She’ll try just about anything. I think it is important to do what is right for you right now. My guess? If a kid is going to be a picky eater, he is going to be a picky eater.

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  49. KJW Avatar

    Rest assured, Luisa — I fed my daughter whatever we were eating (smooshed up quite a bit), plus yogurt, mashed fruit, bottled baby food, all of it — and she is now, and always has been, a great eater. I think if YOU model the pleasure of cooking and eating, Hugo cannot help but pick it up. I probably don’t need to say this, but if you assume your child cannot manage “adult” food, if you give him/her alternate things to eat, then the dining table will eventually become a battleground. One of my favorite memories is traveling through Spain and France when our daughter was just two years old — if we were eating it, then SHE wanted to eat it. And that included mussels, octopus, snails, paella, spicy sausage, garlicky greens, you name it. We have never looked back.

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  50. Seu Avatar

    I kind of believe what Em mensionted. A baby is borned with a specific gene for eating. A picky eating baby, is going always to be picky. What we can do, is help be the least picky he/she can be. 🙂

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