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Reality Check

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I sometimes get the impression that people think I can do no wrong in the kitchen. That my pasta's always al dente, my cakes always risen, my eggs always fluffy. Folks, let me tell you: no one, but no one, is immune to the kitchen disaster.

See this towering beauty of almond meringue, gooseberry-studded whipped cream and yellow cake? Baked in the wee small hours Sunday morning before a 50th wedding anniversary party for my dearest friends in the whole world attended by all their friends and family as well as a woman who regularly wins baking contests in her home state of Hessen? It was, in a word, raw on the inside. Raw. Raw. Raw.

As in, uncooked batter. As in, inedible. As in, DISASTER.

I almost melted into a puddle of shame. I almost let it ruin my day. I almost cried. And then my friend gave me a steadying hug, helped me saw off the top part of the meringue, scooped out the raw innards, and glued the good parts of the cake back together (after all, there was all that nice whipped cream and fresh gooseberries and meringue and toasted almonds). Then we put the surgically-enhanced cake back on the buffet table along with all the other home-baked marvels and you know what? It was the first cake gone.

So next time you find yourself whisk in hand, lower lip trembling, in front of a kitchen disaster, just remember: you're not alone! And there's got to be a solution somewhere. Even if it means throwing it all in the bin and ordering pizza.

Happy Monday!

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86 responses to “Reality Check”

  1. Michelle Avatar
    Michelle

    yes. if it wasn’t for the local Chinese delivery (and their amazing dry-braised green beans), how many nights would i have gone to bed hungry?!
    so well said. thank you!

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  2. Jennifer Jo Avatar
    Jennifer Jo

    Oh my. I feel your pain! And it was a public shame, no less! Every cook’s nightmare. But you handled it with grace and aplomb.
    Reminds me of the time I exploded the kitchen with chicken broth, bones, and fat…but that was a private disaster. Messy (an understatement), yes, but no embarrassment.

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  3. Nancy Avatar
    Nancy

    I have learned many times over that baking for friends always turn into a small problem; If I bake for myself perfect, but for friends or family BAM ugly!

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  4. Anna Avatar
    Anna

    hehehe,
    i also had a meringue cake disaster this weekend (lemon meringue pie). i spent a good part of the morning turning the whole kitchen into complete messiness – put the cake for browning the meringue into the oven, and hoped into the shower completely forgetting about the cake – but absolutely out of my mind.
    my bf came with a cake that had a pitch-black meringue on the top into the bathroom (just 15 in the oven) with this look on his face “where is your head? how can you just forget it for the final step.” – didnt look pretty, still tasted good 😉

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  5. Cowgirl Chef Avatar
    Cowgirl Chef

    I had a kitchen disaster yesterday (delicious but ugly), so I’m redoing the recipe again today. Let us all eat cake, I say — whether it’s half-cooked, ugly, or both!

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  6. Michele Avatar
    Michele

    Hi Luisa,
    I’m a caterer, and sometimes I feel the same way – that people think I never have kitchen disasters. But oh boy, do I!! Not too long ago I did the food for a very posh photo shoot, at the home of a member of British Royalty no less. What was to be a gorgeous Victoria sponge with lime cream and alfonso mangoes became… trifle. A very tasty trifle, but trifle. Oh well, it happens, and you just have to see the positive and make a joke about it if possible!

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  7. Jessika Avatar
    Jessika

    Oh I know this one very well!
    I continue to fail with this one cake with sponge first and meringue over that is to bake at the same time without burning meringue but underbaking the sponge. I AM GOING TO GET IT one of these days. Me vs. cake, I shall win.

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  8. anna (londonfoodieny) Avatar
    anna (londonfoodieny)

    Oh what a stress! I swear every time I cook for other people something goes wrong….

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  9. la ninja Avatar
    la ninja

    I say hooray for humility 🙂

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  10. Amanda Avatar
    Amanda

    It’s nice to know I’m not alone 🙂 I have recently been baking bread (or trying, at least) for the first time since moving to Germany, needless to say it began as a complete disaster! After abandoning my old recipes and buying a German baking book my bread has been at least edible, if ugly, but my trashcan has seen quite a few kitchen disasters in the past few weeks…

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  11. Julia of Randomly Yours, Julia Avatar
    Julia of Randomly Yours, Julia

    The upside is, for every disaster, there’s usually a meal made out of whatever’s in the fridge/pantry at the last minute that turns out like you’d planned it!

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  12. newlywed Avatar
    newlywed

    Thank you so much for posting that…I feel better about my raw banana bread this past week. I blame it all on my oven. It’s totally the oven’s fault. Right?

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  13. Maddie Avatar
    Maddie

    As mortifying as the experience sounds, it’s a good reminder that you have lovely, down-to-earth friends who think you’re awesome…even in the face of kitchen disasters. No small feat!

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  14. Sommer @ A Spicy Perspective Avatar
    Sommer @ A Spicy Perspective

    I know how you feel! It always seems to happen when you mean to impress–never when you are simply cooking for the family!
    It looks beautiful!

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  15. Tracy Avatar
    Tracy

    So beautiful. Glad you were able to save it.

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  16. Jen Avatar
    Jen

    That is the exact reason I don’t hold myself to any type of blog schedule. If something goes really well, perfect–I’ll share it on my blog. If something horribly (even if it’s four days a row of mediocre baked goods or dinner), oh well–any small readership I have can wait. And my family–they can have a pizza, just like you said!

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  17. Zoomie Avatar
    Zoomie

    Oh, dear, so embarrassing! But it looked, and apparently tasted, terrific.

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  18. Anna Avatar
    Anna

    Oh, my, I do surely empathize. But there is almost always a way to fix things! For instance, I once tried, late at night, to puree together some pears and whiskey, intending to pour them over vanilla ice cream. I mean, that sounds kind of good, right? But like I said, late at night, and the fact that this idea even came to me means that I’d probably already consumed a goodly amount of said whiskey. Had about ten friends over. Forgot to put the little circular doo-dad in the top of the mixer. Yeah, whiskied pears on the walls, on the ceiling, on the floor…and then the cat comes in and starts trying to get drunk. What an utter mess. We still all laugh about it, though! (And what wasn’t spewed all over my kitchen was indeed rather good.)

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  19. The Rowdy Chowgirl Avatar
    The Rowdy Chowgirl

    Nice save!
    I would never be brave enough to try to bake anything for public consumption, so I admire those who can and do!

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  20. Victoria Avatar
    Victoria

    Dear Luisa,
    Now I know why they are your best friends!
    Good one.

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  21. ChefMikedotca Avatar
    ChefMikedotca

    As a personal chef, every trip to a client’s house for their very posh dinner party is only 1 cold oven, 1 broken BBQ, 1 broken timer or 1 defective quick read thermometer away from grief…but that’s half the fun of being me…

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  22. Stacey Avatar
    Stacey

    well it looks fabulous..
    where is the recipe??

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  23. michaela Avatar
    michaela

    My mother baked a gorgeous wedding cake one summer only to have it crash in transit (on a boat) and due to the scorching heat. She remedied it with graham crackers to make it structurally sound and served it to all the guests!!

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  24. Tyla Avatar
    Tyla

    Luisa, thanks so much for sharing. It’s always encouraging to hear that I’m not the only one this kind of thing happens to. Usually though I do let it get the best of me, collapsing into a puddle of tears on my kitchen floor for at least a few minutes before attempting to carry on…

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  25. Caitlin @ Amuse-Bouche Avatar
    Caitlin @ Amuse-Bouche

    Well I feel so much better now! Somehow I spaced out the other day and forgot to add flour to the chocolate chip cookies that I brag about and the first batch turned into one very large, very melted, very inedible cookie. Choking back tears, I laughed it off, added some flour, and carried on with the next 3 batches.

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  26. ali Avatar
    ali

    thanks for sharing your failures too, it make me feels so much better. I served my partners family a Zuccinni bread which looked beautiful on the outside, but inside was wet and soggy – i was so ashamed!

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  27. Megan Avatar
    Megan

    That’s pretty good yours was the first gone considering German cakes are some of the best in the world. I miss the German cake culture… having cake right before dinner (or any time), several cakes at a single birthday party, the balance of tart and just a little sweet. Your gooseberry whipped cream sounds lovely.

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  28. Bobbie Avatar
    Bobbie

    I guess none of us can resist sharing our own kitchen disaster stories, after a post like that! My most voluminous one occurred when I was a bread baker (popularly elected, no less) at my coop in college, and that night’s 12 loaves of bread didn’t rise. I was fit to be tied, until my bread baking mentor came to teach me this aspect of bread baking: how to stay calm and recover from disaster, saving ingredients and saving face. We made bread pudding from the heavy loaves, and a quick bread for the next day’s bread allotment. Whole experience taught me a lot. I’m not generally much of a risk-taker, but I do regularly try new, untested recipes when I have company!

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  29. Monica Avatar
    Monica

    Diana Kennedy says, “Cooking teaches you that you’re not always in control….Cooking is life’s biggest comeuppance. Ingredients can fool you.”
    From an interview (with news about her new book! “Oaxaca al Gusto”) http://bit.ly/dfTZQa

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  30. Ben Avatar
    Ben

    LOL. Yeah, it’s not such a big deal when it’s “just” for the blog, but experiencing the occasional epic fail when there are hungry guests in the next room is another thing altogether. Been there. Thanks for sharing. And nice save!

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  31. Tara Avatar
    Tara

    Thanks for the reminder that screwing up in the kitchen isn’t the end of the world. 🙂

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  32. Tami Avatar
    Tami

    I think the mark of a true pro and someone to look up to in the kitchen is someone who can indeed turn a kitchen disaster upside down. It takes so much more skill and imagination and to make a cake some would throw in the trash in to dessert. But thanks for reminding so many of us who put all our worth in making something perfect all the time that it happens and its okay, so roll with it. Great story!

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  33. Amanda at Enchanted Fig Avatar
    Amanda at Enchanted Fig

    I would definitely have puddled. They would have had to mop me up off the floor. Maybe when I have another (another…so many!) public disaster I can be a little more like you and just skip the puddle part. Good job!

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  34. gesikah Avatar
    gesikah

    Aww, I feel for you.
    I had a similar experience several years ago. It was our first time having a get-together with friends at our new home. Everything turned out great until it was time for dessert. I took out the cheesecake (something I had made a several times before) and sliced it and beheld the horror…it was liquid inside. I had made cheesecake soup. I was mortified, especially as my husband and close friends has spent the entire day gushing about my baking expertise. I seriously just want to sit on the kitchen floor and cry. However, I eventually rallied and since they insisted on eating it anyway (albeit with spoons) I guess it all turned out ok in the end.
    To this day I don’t know what I did wrong, but I have made one since (took quite a while to get over the trauma) and it turned out just fine.

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  35. mai Avatar
    mai

    Danke Luisa, that came at such an opportune moment for me :). I didn’t cook tonight, but your idea about being ok with mistakes, and shrugging them off by switching gears entirely to achieve the same outcome, really resonates with me. Nobody is perfect, right? Here is to the rest of the week! 🙂

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  36. Xiaolu (6 Bittersweets) Avatar
    Xiaolu (6 Bittersweets)

    Thanks for sharing this story, Luisa! I’ve definitely stayed up into the wee hours of the morning baking and then fretting over some small detail that didn’t come out perfectly. A reality check is exactly what my OCD tendencies need. Cake looks lovely, btw.

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  37. Barbara Avatar
    Barbara

    Well, to look at that cake you’d never know the disaster below. It’s gorgeous and sure sounds like everyone loved it. Good save, Luisa!
    It happens to all of us! And sometimes it just can’t be repaired.

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  38. Christa Avatar
    Christa

    So sorry it was a disaster because the photo is gorgeous and would have otherwise made me want to bite into it.

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  39. Heather Avatar
    Heather

    perfect words of encouragement, and that cake looks good to me!

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  40. The Food Hunter Avatar
    The Food Hunter

    Well it sure looks delicious. hey we’ve all been there but you did a great job covering it up.

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  41. Elke Avatar
    Elke

    The cake still looks very tasty! I just made chocolate chip cookies (does it get more basic?) and they’re inedible. I used parchment paper and by the time the timer was beeping, the paper was almost completely burnt, cookies black on bottom and still mostly raw on top. What could the problem be?!

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  42. The Purple Foodie Avatar
    The Purple Foodie

    Such a cute post! I love how sporting you are. We’re all in this together, aren’t we? 🙂

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  43. Mikel Posh Avatar
    Mikel Posh

    It’s so nice to know that I’m not the only one who doesn’t always get it right!
    THe cake looks fantastic, anyway.
    😉
    M.

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  44. Meredi Avatar
    Meredi

    Nice improve, and beautiful to boot.
    I will bake bread but NEVER desserts for company…lol…my meringue always weeps upon arrival…the cakes fall..the cookies spread out to cover the entire pan…that sort of thing. Poached pears, or gelato with ginger marmalade or rhubarb sauce are my go-to’s.

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  45. Rowhouse Blog Avatar
    Rowhouse Blog

    I just want to say, regardless of what was going on with this cake on the inside, on the outside it still looks absolutely SCRUMPTIOUS. I am drooling here just looking at that poufy meringue and all the cream oozing out the sides… yum!

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  46. Christina Avatar
    Christina

    Thank you for sharing that! I get very upset when things don’t turn out the way I want them to. Angry even. And then I cry. And then I feel silly for getting upset over food. Your post made me smile (as they all do) and it’s encouraging to read all the other comments of others who feel the same. And after all, tomorrow is another day with no baking mistakes in it.

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  47. Denise @ Chez Danisse Avatar
    Denise @ Chez Danisse

    Now that’s a good friend : )

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  48. MollyCookie Avatar
    MollyCookie

    Well it looks beautiful, I’m sorry it didn’t work out. You win some, you lose some I guess! Thanks for sharing your defeats as well as your success!

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  49. nico Avatar
    nico

    Oh, I get it. This is what the cake looked like BEFORE you performed the surgery. Or am I wrong about that? Impressive looking! Now I think I understand more about food photography 😀

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  50. Foodieinberlin Avatar
    Foodieinberlin

    The mark of a person is how well he/she withstands disasters -large or small… Not how they are when everything is peachy keen. And of course, the mark of a good friend, is that they are there to help you pick up the pieces. You seem to be on the right track in both departments : )

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